Health/Beauty

A New Parenting Low

by Sarah Novak on January 5, 2012

So we started at the gym this week.  I was beyond excited to find a place that would accept an 10 week old.  I’m allowed to leave her for one hour, which is the perfect amount of time for me to do a class (or so I thought).  Unfortunately, Nia isn’t so keen on being in daycare, even if it’s just for one hour.  On my first day I chose a Pilates class and was merrily working my core until an employee slaps a sign up on the glass that says “Nia Mom Now”.  It wouldn’t have been quite so embarassing if I could have just slipped out, but I didn’t see it and the instructor announced it so everyone could check it out.  Definitely a new low in my parenting journey.

I’m no quitter, so back we went on day 2 for another try.  This time I’m in Bodypump with 50+ other individuals.  I made it a whole 30 minutes before there was a loud knock at the window and a staff member pointed frantically at me.  I suppose I should be thankful there wasn’t a sign this time, but it was still painful.  I quietly packed up my bar and left to sympathy looks from those who were in my class yesterday.  I go down to find her screaming her bloody murder scream, which made it all the more embarrassing.  SIGH.

Today I’m giving the staff a break and just attending solo tonight.  But by jove, we’re going back tomorrow.  I will not be derailed!

On a happier note, I made my first gym friend and we’re having a lunch date next week.  At this point my gym membership looks like it won’t be used much for actual working out, so I need to at least make the most of it for social connections.  Maybe I can become known as the “Lobby Mom” who no one has ever actually seen working out!  :)

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Nia’s Nervous System Checks Out

by Sarah Novak on December 18, 2011

Friday was a big day for little Nia.  It was her first visit to see Dr. Tonnie at Wellness Wave.  As many of you know, I’ve been doing Network Spinal Analysis (NSA) with Tonnie for several years now.  My work with her has helped me eliminate my chronic back pain, deal with my anxiety better and have a better overall level of health.  I can’t say enough good things about NSA and my two sisters (who now go there too) would agree.  I also had the opportunity to go during my pregnancy and I attribute the ease and short length of my labor to the neural conditioning I did beforehand.  I won’t go into the specifics of what NSA is – you can read about it at her website above or on two of my previous posts that describe it in detail: POST 1, POST 2.

So back to Nia.  When Tonnie told me that Nia could really benefit from NSA and that she did sessions for babies as young as a few days old, I jumped at the chance to get Nia’s neural network functioning at a highly efficient level from early on.  Since her neural pathways are so fresh and are forming connections so rapidly at this age, she’s able to undergo a much more rapid, radical transformation than an adult can.

Dr. Tonnie’s report was very positive.  Nia’s nervous system looked great.  Her only issue was that her upper-most vertebrae (C1) was out of alignment from her passage through the birth canal.  This is very common in babies since birth is the single greatest stressor they will experience in their lives.  She told me that if left out of alignment, Nia would see a greater incidence of ear infections.  Tonnie was not surprised when I told her that Nia had already gotten her first ear infection at 6 weeks old!

I’m so thrilled that my daughter is getting to experience holistic medicine at this age.  It’s made such a difference in my well-being and I sooo wish that I would have started earlier.

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Scrapping the Birth Plan

by Sarah Novak on October 6, 2011

In case it isn’t obvious, I’ve got some MAJOR control issues surfacing around this whole birth thing.  This is frustrating for a variety of reasons, but most notably because I’ve done a ton of personal work on this in the past and largely eliminated it from several areas of my life.

I imagine that it is triggering me so intensely for a couple reasons:

  1. The birth signifies the beginning of a massive new chapter in our life and I always get a wee bit anxious during transition periods.  And when anxiety shows up for me, control usually likes to join the party as well.
  2. I feel very vulnerable with the idea of birth and the fact that it’s not just MY BIRTH, but Nia’s as well.  Vulnerability inevitably causes fear for me, which I then try to mask with control.  All an illusion of course, but pretending to be in control feels so much better than embracing the vulnerability (just being honest…)

SOOO, if I truly believe that control is simply an illusion (which I do), then it dawned on me that this whole idea of a birth plan is encouraging this bad behavior.

Now, let me clarify.  I KNOW how I’d like my birth to ideally play out.  My care team knows my preferences and so does my husband.  I realized that’s enough.  I don’t need to write it all up in bullet points and tack it to my hospital room door so that I can check off each thing as it happens (or beat myself up when it doesn’t).  Again, it just mentally reinforces this illusion that I have some semblance of control over this process.

So there you have it.  I’m scrapping the formal birth plan. I’m clear on what my birthing ‘wish list’ is, have had the conversations I need to have and now simply just need to let go of it and embrace the experience for whatever it is.  As with all intention setting, the first step is to be clear on what you want, put it out into the Universe, and then release all attachment asking for “This or something better.”

You see, I’ve been too attached to the way the birth looks, to the ‘doing’ part of it.  My coach helped me realize that I need to spend my time focusing on what I want the experience of birth to be like, essentially the ‘being’ part of the birth.  It is very possible that the events (or doing part) could play out in a variety of different ways and I could still have the ‘being experience’ that I want.

Isn’t that a cool A-HA?  So instead of focusing on the circumstances that may be out of my control, I simply focus on how I want to be present for the birth (no matter how it plays out).  Happily, that is something that’s within my power!  Stay tuned to see what new revelations show up in these last few weeks.  If there’s one thing I can say for sure about this process, it’s that the learning seems to be non-stop!

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A Brief History of My Relationship with My Body

I’m sure you’re wondering what the heck I’m talking about when I say “my relationship with my body’.  Surprisingly, we all have one.  Think of it as a lens that we view our body through.  Much like any relationship in our lives, we choose both the perspective that we view it from and the time and energy we invest into it.

Once I started noticing that I had a perspective on my body, I became aware of the wide variety of ways in which people view (and consequently treat) their bodies.  Perspectives I have seen include:

  • “My Body is a Temple” – This person meditated, practiced yoga, ate organic foods and got regular massages.
  • My Body is merely a Physical Container” (one of my old body perspectives) – I took my body for granted, didn’t think about what I put into it and expected it to perform under any condition (stress, sickness, etc).  I did no caretaking of it whatsoever.
  • “My Body is Miraculous” – This cancer survivor became awed by the healing capability of his body and upon entering remission, started to put his body through incredible physical trials to honor the powerful thing that it was.

Those are just a few examples, but I’m sure you have others to contribute.  Anyhow, upon more reflection I realized that I’ve always viewed my body in a negative light.  Without ever putting it in words until this year, I realized I firmly believed:

I GOT STUCK WITH A CRAP BODY.

This limiting belief goes back as far as grade school when I failed miserably at sports (and was often picked last for teams) and was strengthened during my Senior year of high school when I got diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis in my entire body (a chronic, life-long disease).  Those two in themselves would have been enough to cement this belief, but my body perspective took another hit when I went into a depression period around age 25.  During that dark time I began to have body-related anxiety (mostly around injury) and totally and completely saw my body as weak, frail and incapable of healing.  Not only did this take a major toll on me physically, but it also had a huge impact on my confidence (ie: if I couldn’t count on my body anymore, what makes me think my mind can cut it…).

Time passed and I did my best to resolve these thoughts with my coaches and therapists.  The thing is, limiting beliefs are tricky little buggers.  They lie in your subconscious mind and get accepted as truth over time.  That’s why they’re so hard to dismantle!  First we have to become aware of the belief, decide it’s not serving us anymore and then go about creating a new, more healthy belief to replace it.

I guess you could say that’s where I am right now with my body relationship.  I recognize that this old “MY BODY IS CRAP” belief is outdated and limiting.  It doesn’t fit me anymore and I desperately want to view my body in a new light.  And even as a coach with all my fancy tools and self-awareness, I still know this is going to be a hard one for me to change.

Could Natural Birth Be the Answer?

When I initially found out I was pregnant, I did what I believe many women do, which is to assume that I wouldn’t be able to handle the pain and therefore planned to get an epidural.  This fit perfectly with the lens I viewed my body through at that time and I knew it would have been a perfectly acceptable path.

However….somewhere in the midst of reading hundreds of birth stories, it dawned on me that a natural, unmedicated birth could be the PERFECT way for me to see my body in a whole new way.  To RECLAIM my body for the MIRACULOUS thing that it is and see it as POWERFUL, CAPABLE, WHOLE and RESILIENT for once.  In order to do that though, I’d have to not only be focused on the end goal (a healthy baby) but the experience of labor as well (seeing it as equally transformative and empowering).  For me, that was the ultimate challenge and one that I desperately wanted to say yes to.

But Can I Really Do It?

Honestly, I don’t know.  Does any woman really know until she’s in the middle of it?

What I do know is that I’ve put my intention of having an unmedicated birth out into the Universe.  I’ve selected a care team that knows my wishes and will encourage and motivate me when I want to quit.  I’ve done the mindset work to deal with fear issues that will surely arise during the experience.  And now I must simply let go and recognize that it is not my birth to control, it’s Nia’s.

At times I feel the desire to control this process rise up in me so strongly that I just want to scream, “I WILL NOT FAIL.”  Because that’s how I saw it at first.  If I didn’t fulfill my desire of having a natural birth, then somehow I had failed my child, myself and my body (losing what I perceived as my ONE CHANCE to reclaim my body and forever change my relationship with it).  Yes, extreme I know.  That’s how my thoughts often tumble out when tinged with anxiety.  Thankfully, both my husband and my coach called me on it and I did some powerful work to let go of the need for control.

Which brings me to where I am now.  I sincerely hope that I get my dream of having an unmedicated vaginal birth, but if it is not to be, then I intend to be gentle with myself; gracefully accepting where my personal limits lie.  In closing, I leave you with one of my favorite quotes that reinforces my current mindset,

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” – Reinhold Niebuhr

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Take THAT Postpartum Depression!

by Sarah Novak on September 20, 2011

Fact: 10-15% of women are affected by postpartum depression (PPD).

Fact: If you have a history of depression in your past, you are 30% MORE LIKELY than the average woman to get postpartum depression (PPD).

Reality: Given my history of anxiety/depression, there’s a strong chance I could end up dealing with PPD.

So what am I doing about it?

Not being one to sit around to ‘wait and see’, I’m setting up my support/resource network now IN THE UNFORTUNATE EVENT that I do end up with PPD.  And what does that mean, you ask?

Well, first off, it means that I’ve remained on my anti-anxiety meds (prozac) throughout the pregnancy and will continue to stay on them after the birth.  I know for a fact that it made the difference during the first trimester when I was on the edge of depression and I trust that it will help regulate my hormones post-birth as well.

Second, I’ve sought out a therapist that specializes in PPD.  I met with her today to establish a relationship in case I need to see her regularly after the birth.  It was challenging finding a therapist that specializes in PPD and takes insurance (for some odd reason a large number of practitioners in town accept NO insurance plans).  I happened to come across a unique community clinic that just started up at George Washington University.  They accommodate all financial situations, so it ended up being something we could afford even though they don’t technically take insurance either.

The clinic is called The 5 Trimesters Wellness Clinic and supports women from preconception to parenthood.  It is staffed by Dr. Dawn Flosnik, a Resident at GWU.  Her offices are located in the Medical Faculty Associates Building at 2150 Pennsylvania Ave NW, Washington DC 20037.  Appointments are a mere $40 for the initial intake and $10 for each session after that.  Appointments can be scheduled at 202-741-2888.

I’m thrilled to have found this practice and will be using them to help put my last piece into place, which is identifying postpartum support groups in the area.  It’s comforting to know that although I can’t control if PPD happens to me, I can be proactive about how I’m going to respond to it.

To the other pregnant mommas out there, if you have a history of depression in your background, consider establishing support relationships NOW instead of waiting until you’re in the thick of things.  I’ll leave you with a short listing of resources I’ve found on the topic:

Resources specific to DC/Northern Virginia:

  1. http://www.postpartumva.org/wheretogethelp.html

General Resources about PPD:

  1. http://www.postpartum.net/
  2. http://pacemoms.org/

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Blissed Out

by Sarah Novak on July 5, 2011

One of the best pregnancy benefits I’ve experienced thus far has been an increased awareness of my body.  I think this occurs naturally for most pregnant women, but to varying degrees depending on the degree to which you let it affect you.  As with anything, I realized that there were two ways I could decide to respond to this increase in body sensations.  I could either choose to be annoyed with all the physical changes or allow this experience to give me a heightened understanding of my incredible body!  I bet you can guess which one I chose…

In the past, I thought of my body mostly as a vessel or container.  I didn’t pay much attention to it and expected it to function at all times.  If it was sick, I expected it to push through.  If it was tired, I expected it to ‘get over it’.  That way of tending to my body phased out around age 25 when my body DEMANDED that it be taken care of.  It went into full-on rebellion, gifting me with 2 years of physical pain, anxiety, depression and panic attacks.  And let me tell you, when your body wages war on you, YOU LISTEN!

Let’s just say that I got the message and employed every resource I could think of to make it stop.  I got a therapist, found a chiropractor, did physical therapy, hired a life coach and started Network Spinal Analysis, all within the period of a year.  It was slow going, but over time I learned how to care for my body and it responded in the most amazing way (translation: I feel the best I’ve ever felt in my life and now trust that my body has the capacity to heal itself.)

Surprisingly, the body awareness that came with pregnancy was on a different level (more like a class titled Body Understanding 201 vs. the 101 learning I had to do in my mid-20′s).  I have enjoyed taking care of myself these last few years, so with a little encouragement from my husband (and the gift of open time on my calendar), I entered into a period of radical self-care for my body.  It sounds easier than it actually was.  I had a lot of guilt at first as my gremlin whispered a constant stream of nasty messages in my ear:

  • You are being WAY too self-indulgent!
  • What a waste of your time this self-care is, you should be producing something!
  • Are you really going to nap AGAIN?  You already slept 10 hours last night!

I eventually was able to ignore the messages after my husband reminded me at dinner one night that the most important thing I could do for our family right now was to grow a healthy baby (which starts with taking care of myself and remaining in a sound emotional state).  What a smart man I married!  Somehow that released all the guilt and I was able to view growing a baby as my job for 9 months.  That was the best perspective shift I made all year!

Since getting to MN, I’ve taken my current ‘job’ very seriously, engaging in a variety of wellness practices that help keep me centered.  On any given day, I both take a 30 minute walk and do one of the following: Prenatal Yoga, Prenatal Massage or Network Spinal Analyis.  The combination of these 4 things has kept me in an amazing state of being these last 5 weeks.  I have none of the anxiety that existed early in the pregnancy and I’ve developed a strong connection with both my body and the baby.  I am proud of the work I’ve done and am curious about the impact it will have on both my labor and the baby’s demeanor.

Since this post is getting a bit longer than I prefer, I’ll give you a teaser that my next post will talk about a very cool experience I had that was a direct result of my increased body awareness.  Stay tuned for that!

From Novakistan, post Blissed Out

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Baby Novak Approves of Yoga + The First Kick

by Sarah Novak on June 21, 2011

Big day today.  After an extensive search, I finally selected my Prenatal Yoga Studio.  I ended up choosing Blooma in St. Paul, which is devoted exclusively to Pre and Post-natal Yoga, in addition to Mom & Baby Yoga classes.  The studio is located in an adorable house on Grand Avenue and just oozed baby.  I loved everything about it.

I arrived a bit early to get signed up for the 1 month trial package.  They had a fantastic unlimited class rate of $64 for the first month and $99 for each month after that.  I’ll only be able to do it for one month anyways, so it ends up being a steal of a deal for me!  There are 5 or 6 prenatal yoga classes a week at this studio, so there are plenty of ways for me to get in 3-4 classes a week.  They also have studios in Edina and Shakopee as well for those in the South and West metro.

There were 3 other women in the class and we began with introductions, which I liked.  I was pleased to see that my belly was not the smallest!  It made me feel like a real (translation: ‘veteran’) pregnant woman.  I’m not sure what that’s all about, but I’m eager for my belly to look legitimately pregnant…

I went into the class expecting to breeze through it, since I’m in reasonable shape and have done some yoga in the past (albeit 5 years ago).  A breeze it was not.  It totally and completely kicked my butt (and we were even encouraged to modify and take as many breaks as we needed).  By the end my legs were so shaky that I kept losing my balance and eventually stumbled into the 8 month pregnant woman, almost knocking her over.  At that point the instructor graciously came over behind me and propped me up until I got stabilized again.  SHEESH.  You’d think I could have a little more coordination!

My favorite part was the end, where we were lying in the dead man’s pose (flat on back, just focused on breathing).  I was so thrilled for the opportunity to lay down for 5 minutes!   :)  While I was enjoying my rest time, the instructor came around and did energy work on us, which was a really neat way to end the session.  So there I was breathing with my hands on my belly when all of a sudden I feel this whomping kick in my gut!  AAAAHHHHH!!!!  FINALLY, the first time I felt the baby kick!  And this was no flutter people, it was like a bubble popping in my belly.  As soon as it happened I blurted it out to the room and all the other mommy-to-be’s appropriately oohed and aahed.  It was bliss, I tell you.  Guess Baby Novak likes yoga!  Good thing we’re going back for more tomorrow.  Let’s hope that my coordination improves a bit overnight!

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Sarah Gets Medevac’d

by Sarah Novak on April 19, 2011


So last week I had the chance to go on my first-ever Medevac for the Foreign Service.  The term sounds a little scary and that’s because usually it is just that – A Medical Evacuation.  Medevacs are used when appropriate Medical care for your condition cannot be garnered at post (and by appropriate they mean something on par with what you’d get in the States).  Each region has a Medevac hub (in our case Singapore), where the Regional Medical Office is available to assist with these extraordinary cases.

Thankfully, my Medevac was for a routine pregnancy test that would be standard in the States but is not performed in the Philippines.  The test is called the First Trimester Scan and is used to screen for potential genetic defects.  The Philippines bans this test because they believe if you knew that your child had a genetic defect then you would want to abort it.  Never mind the fact that abortions are illegal here too.  Doesn’t make a ton of sense to me but fits in with what I know of the Catholic church’s influence here.

So on to the test!  The Doctor spent nearly an hour scanning the baby from head to toe using the Ultrasound machine.  He literally went part by part and made sure every finger, toe and limb was accounted for.  The scan could also get pictures of the baby’s internal organs, so we also checked for each organ system as well.  It was wicked-cool to see the baby’s heart up on the screen and have the doctor point out the 4 chambers to me!  He was also able to see bone structures (like the curve of the spine) and rule out any skeletal disorders.  Oh, and then there was the blood systems too, where he pulled up this picture of red and blue veins surging through the baby’s body.  Can I just say that I am AWED by technology?

This process was sooo calming for a first-time Momma like me.  Not only was I assured that my baby had every bone and organ it needed, but that it also had a mere 1 in 12,000 chance of having a genetic abnormality!  I’ll also be a tease and tell you that I got an 80% confirmation of what the gender should be, but I’m not telling until it’s 100% certain…  :)

So that was my first-ever Medevac experience!  Thanks to the US Government for assuring that we get access to top-quality care overseas!  Our growing family greatly appreciates it.

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Me and Energy Healing

by Sarah Novak on April 6, 2011

I’m all about trying new alternative therapies (especially after having such amazing results with Network Spinal Analysis a few years back), so when my friend Selina suggested I check out an Energy Healer she had visited in Manila, I was all for it.

I wasn’t sure what to expect, but Moi (the healer) talked me through the process at the beginning a bit so that I could relax and receive the maximum benefit possible.  When I think of energy healing, I immediately think of the form I’m most familiar with, called Reiki.  Based on my understanding of Reiki (someone correct me if I’m wrong), it involves the movement of energy through the body but doesn’t usually incorporate touch (instead the hands hover over the body).  This healing work was slightly different, as her hands were on me throughout the entire session, moving from place to place every 2 minutes or so.

We began with a component called Vibration Healing using a Crystal Quartz “Singing” Bowl.  She had a different bowl that corresponded to each Chakra and chose the area she thought needed the most tuning after listening to me talk for a bit.  The vibration was wicked cool, unlike anything I’ve ever felt in my life.  I could literally feel it in every inch of my being.  I swear my blood was racing faster and I could feel my energy swirling around inside me.  As if that wasn’t cool in and of itself, the sound was so pervasive that it seemed to fill up every inch of the space.  It wasn’t hurting my ears or too loud, but felt like the bowl was right next to my eardrum instead of across the room.

After 5 minutes with the crystal bowl we moved on to the main part of the session.  She turned on soothing music, asked me to close my eyes and began placing her hands on various parts of my body, starting with my head.  She did everything in parallel, so if she had her hand on my right elbow, she’d also have it on my left.

The majority of the session was calming and peaceful, although I did have a curious response when she held her fingers on my temple.  It was as if my head was suddenly a pressure cooker and the place where she was touching me became so pressurized that at one point I thought if she didn’t remove her hands soon that I wouldn’t be able to stand it anymore.  Thankfully she moved on to the next place, so I didn’t have to say anything.  WHEW!

We ended our session with the singing bowl again and then we talked afterward.  She had seen a vision during the work, which she shared with me at that point.  She asked me if I had seen anything but I had not.  She also talked about where in my body she had felt the most energy built up/blocked.

I always struggle to get my head around this stuff (although I know it’s impossible).  I’ve learned to be open to things I don’t understand and from that place I’m able to have cool experiences like these.  All I know is that the next day my body felt toxic and was consumed with headaches, nausea and indigestion (things I have not experienced during my entire pregnancy).  It definitely made me pause and wonder if my body was detoxing in response to the energy work.

If you’d like to check it out for yourself, here’s the info to get in touch with Moi:

www.infinitebeing.ws

Phone: +639086130124

Email: infinitebeingempowerment@gmail.com

*All session are held at Moi’s home in Pasig City

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My Nia Initiation

by Sarah Novak on February 3, 2011

Lately Facebook has been abuzz with talk about an exercise class called Nia.  Whenever I hear something come up again and again, I just trust it’s a sign that I’m supposed to explore it further.  So that’s exactly what I did in this case.  I went to the Nia Website and searched for classes in the Philippines.  And there was exactly 1 available for me to choose from!  I guess I should be thankful that there was even that!

The class is held on Monday and Wednesday mornings in a suburb of Manila called Alabang.  From Makati (where I live) this is about an 8 mile drive.  With morning traffic though it becomes a 1 hour drive (or 3 hours round trip including the class).  I was determined to try it though so off we went on Wednesday morning.

The class was held in a basement that had been converted into a studio.  The teacher was a Filipina who had done her training in the States.  I was nervous it was just going to be me for awhile, but 2 other Filipina women scooted in right before the start time in classic Filipino fashion (I found it amusing that the instructor tells everyone the class starts at 8 AM so that it ensures that they’ll be there by the ACTUAL start time of 8:15 AM).

Nia is a blend of modern dance and martial arts.  The steps are fairly basic, which means you don’t have to be a strong dancer to be able to follow along (I was relieved about that!).  Nia’s big focus is on awareness of the body and adding your own personal interpretation to the choreography.  Hence, a routine is repeated for several weeks so that in the beginning you focus on memorizing the steps and then you’re freed up to add your own soulful interpretation later while still following the general movements.

Suffice to say, there’s a lot of creative freedom given here!  I noticed that I felt uncomfortable with that at first.  I wanted my arm and leg movements to look JUST LIKE the instructor’s.  As the class went on though I realized it wasn’t as much about  copying as it was about letting myself feel the music and find my own rhythm.  This process felt very similar to what’s going on in my business, moving from a place of copying (or following a guru’s instructions down to the minutest detail) to creating from my own internal place of knowing.  I can already see how continuing to do Nia will help unleash this creative permission in myself that will hopefully spill over into all the other areas of my life!

Here’s a quick 2 minute video will give you a more visceral feel of what Nia’s all about:

I haven’t decided yet how frequently I’ll go down to Alabang for class, but I can feel that some part of me is being called to explore this more fully.  Whether that means attending classes on a regular basis or becoming an instructor myself, I do not yet know…. all I can say at this point is that if you are looking for a fun, energizing workout routine that is compatible with all ages and abilities then Nia is worth checking out!

Click HERE to find a class near you!

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