There have been many moments in the last 18 years when I’ve laughed over the fact that I ended up with a husband and daughter who are history fanatics. It would be one thing if it was just a private interest of theirs, but instead it’s wormed its way into our everyday lives with foreign policy dinner conversations, The Looming Tower as our family book club read, and the very likely possibility that I’ll be going to Normandy in the near future because it’s atop Nia’s bucket list. What amuses me most about this is that I didn’t give a damn about history until we joined the foreign service (and was only then motivated to learn so I didn’t embarrass myself). But I can proudly say that I’ve come a long way over the years and can now name the capitals of 100+ countries, have a decent pulse on world politics, and have beefed up my American History some too.
I think what’s made the biggest difference for me is experiencing a place versus just reading about it. There’s no way I could have gone to the amazing countries we’ve lived in and NOT wanted to know more because lived experiences are infinitely more interesting than seeing a place on tv or reading about it in a textbook.
I vividly remember 11th grade American History. My teacher, Mr. Conway, would get so excited about the things we were talking about, and all I could think was BOOOOOO-RIIIING. It just didn’t translate for me, despite him being so engaged in the subject. The topic I loathed the most? The Civil War.
Fast forward 30 years when I’m presented with a second chance to dive deep into the Civil War, this time with my daughter by my side. This opportunity came about because Nick had to spend a week near Richmond, VA in a security training course for his upcoming one-year tour in Baghdad, Iraq. Nia and I are keen to spend all the time we can with him until he leaves in a few short days, however, we had a lot of hours to fill between 8 and 5 PM while he was at class. Given that Richmond was the capital of the Confederacy, there were an abundance of sites and museums within the area. She wanted to do all Civil War, all day. I negotiated her down to half-day Civil War, half-day Mommy’s interests.
For starters, we walked right by the White House of the Confederacy on our way to our first stop, the Civil War Museum in downtown Richmond. Did you even know there was a Southern White House built for Jefferson Davis, the President of the Confederate States? That was news to me! The museum was a great place to start because it gave us a refresher on the circumstances that led up to the war, as well as an overview of the major battles.
The next day we took a drive to the town of Appomattox to visit the Appomattox Court House National Historical Park to see the place where Lee surrendered to Grant, leading to the end of the war. If you’re like me, and assumed they made their agreement in the Court House at Appomattox, you’d be wrong! I’ll clear that up later.
The TOWN itself was called Appomattox Court House because it was the county seat (where the county of Appomattox’s government was, including a court house). In 1865 there were about 150 people living there, about half of whom were enslaved Africans. The war was being fought in the surrounding area in April of 1965 and Appomattox Court House lay between the two enemies. That was where Lee asked Grant to meet him to discuss the surrender. Lee sent a soldier to find a suitable place for the discussion and it was soon decided that Wilmer McLean’s living room–yes, someone’s random living room–would be the site of this iconic moment. Here it is:
I would have sworn to you that it was signed in a courthouse, but now I know better. The original structure had been destroyed (we heard a great story about a visitor who said her Grandma used to sell bricks from the McLean house as historic relics to people passing by on trains during the great depression), but the Park Service had rebuilt the house to look as it would have in 1865. The same was true for the other structures in the park, though a few were actually original. It really gave you a sense of what the town would have felt like at the time.
What I found most moving though was seeing how gracious the winning side was to the Confederates. They were very focused on reuniting the country, not punishing the South for their actions. While the Confederate Army had to leave their weapons behind, they were allowed to keep their horses and were issued “parole tickets” that allowed them safe passage home. I was trying to imagine a modern equivalent of this; like if, God forbid, we had a civil war today over gun or abortion rights. Given the extreme partisan nature of the present day, I think the winning side would be hard-pressed to extend that kind of grace to the loser, which made it all the more impressive in my mind.
As you might expect, Nia was oohing and aahing over every last artifact. I have to admit I was quite impressed with her Civil War knowledge. I didn’t think that was one of her interest areas but she could rattle off all the major Generals and battles in the war. She kept quizzing me to make sure I was paying attention and actually reading the signs. And I was, I promise! :) No zoning out with this kid…
We wrapped up our Civil War learning with a stop at Ford’s Theatre in Washington, D.C., the place where Lincoln was shot five days after Lee’s surrender. Lincoln’s commitment to eradicating slavery seemed like the linchpin in all this, which was why it felt so important to include this place as well.
As our Civil War excursions came to an end I was surprised to find that I’d enjoyed much of it. I had a much better grasp on the challenges of this time, as well as the varying perspectives that were at play. Perhaps most importantly, it helped me imagine what it would have been like to live through that tumultuous period in history and to appreciate how that struggle made our Union stronger. During our walk to the car after the Civil War Museum, I asked Nia what is was that she loved so much about history. I don’t remember her exact words, but I remember the gist of it–that everything we have now is built on what came before and that to truly understand ourselves, we must study the past. Very wise, that 13-year-old of mine…
I leave you with this awesome picture of our hotel receptionist’s jacket showcasing pins from our various Embassies around the World. We are staying at a hotel in the DC area that many foreign service officers and local staff stay at when they come to training, hence why he’s gathered such an impressive collection. It feels great to be back in our old stomping grounds in the heart of it all with our amazing colleagues. Grateful to be continuing on this adventure, even if it means having to be apart from my husband for a year. Thanks for reading ’til the end of this post–it got way longer than I intended!
